Ḥurmat al-Muṣāharah Revised

Question:

Country: India

My friend when he was 15 years old touched his mother while masturbating and in thought he was considering her an actress whom he liked but in reality he knew she is her mother but now he is 19 year old and he has become religious know and is very very ashamed of the act, is the nikah of his mother with her husband broken or not and what is the method of repentance

She was sleeping and he did not ejaculate
If he ejaculated what is the ruling?

(Question published as received)

Answer:

In the name of Allāh, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful

As-salāmu ‘alaykum wa-ramatullāhi wa-barakātuh

Ḥurmat al-Muṣāharah has taken place. Hence, your friend’s parents have to separate. There is no way for his parents to remain in a marriage together. [1]

Your friend should be ashamed of perpetrating this despicable act and inform his parents of his shameful doings. He should seek their forgiveness and also beg Allāh Ta‘ālā to forgive him.

And Allāh Ta‘ālā Knows Best

Addendum:

After further inquiry, the questioner has clarified that the touching was from atop a sweater. In light of this information, the ruling will be different.

One of the requirements for Ḥurmat al-Muṣāharah is that the touching is either on bare skin or on a thin covering whereby the warmth of the skin is felt.[2] In the absence of this, Ḥurmat al-Muṣāharah would not have taken place and the marriage between the mother and the father would remain intact.

It is a relief that despite the despicable nature of this act, Allāh has saved the marriage of the parents who did not have any idea about the act. It should bring forth much needed introspection. May Allāh Ta‘ālā keep all parties upright, astute and steadfast on ḥayā’, humility and īmān, āmīn.

And Allāh Ta‘ālā Knows Best

(Mufti) Bilal al-Mahmudi

Concurred by,
Mufti Faisal al-Mahmudi


[1]

قال ابن عابدين الدمشقي الحنفي (المتوفى: 1252هـ) نقلا عن فتح القدير: وقوله: بشهوة في موضع الحال، فيفيد اشتراط الشهوة حال المس، فلو مس بغير شهوة، ثم اشتهى عن ذلك المس لا تحرم عليه. اهـ
وكذلك في النظر كما في البحر، فلو اشتهى بعدما غض بصره لا تحرم
(رد المحتار مع الدر المختار. ج ٣، ص ٣٣. دار الفكر – بيروت)

قال أبو البركات النسفي (المتوفى: 710هـ): والزّنا واللّمس والنّظر بشهوةٍ يوجب حرمة المصاهرة. (كنز الدقائق. ص ٢٥٢. دار البشائر الإسلامية)

قال شمس الأئمة السرخسي (المتوفى: 483هـ): ثم حرمة المصاهرة بهذه الأسباب تتعدى إلى آبائه، وإن علوا وأبنائه، وإن سفلوا من قبل الرجال والنساء جميعا، وكذلك تتعدى إلى جداتها وإلى نوافلها لما بينا أن الأجداد والجدات بمنزلة الآباء والأمهات، والنوافل بمنزلة الأولاد فيما تنبني عليه الحرمة. (المبسوط للسرخسي. ج ٤، ص ٢٠٨. دار المعرفة)

[2]

قال ابن عابدين الدمشقي الحنفي (المتوفى: 1252هـ): قوله (بحائل لا يمنع الحرارة) أي ولو بحائل الخ فلو كان مانعا لا تثبت الحرمة كذا في أكثر الكتب. (رد المحتار. ج ٣، ص ٣٢. ط بابي الحلبي)